She Writes and Draws

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I just wanted to say thank you to those of you who’ve donated to our film. A couple of weeks ago, I shared how we’ve been supporting this film ourselves for the last year. While we’ve been turned down from some grants, and are still waiting for and continuing to apply to many others, we are laboring under the mentality that we’re going to keep making this film excellent until we can’t go on any longer.
We are in scrambling mode for the finishing funds to get this film to festival and every $10, $15, and $20 (astoundingly, one of you blew me away with $100) is an amazing gift. You’re helping the film get its VITAL post-production phase, which will turn all the amazing interviews we’ve gotten with the Duwamish, Chinook, politicians, activists and academics into a fascinating, artfully-done film. As I said to one of our donors earlier today, it’s hard not to sound PBS-y when I talk about how “your donation helps provide great programming for PEOPLE LIKE YOU” but it is what it is: you’re helping and that’s amazing.
I just can’t believe I have such amazing friends here online. From my early days here on Tumblr when people helped me recover from my miscarriage, or helped workshop my novel, to those of you who just interact with me regularly with my random TV-obsessed, puppy-centric, writing and filmmaking life; I feel so much better about what I’m taking on any given day knowing I have such fantastic friends here. 

I just wanted to say thank you to those of you who’ve donated to our film. A couple of weeks ago, I shared how we’ve been supporting this film ourselves for the last year. While we’ve been turned down from some grants, and are still waiting for and continuing to apply to many others, we are laboring under the mentality that we’re going to keep making this film excellent until we can’t go on any longer.

We are in scrambling mode for the finishing funds to get this film to festival and every $10, $15, and $20 (astoundingly, one of you blew me away with $100) is an amazing gift. You’re helping the film get its VITAL post-production phase, which will turn all the amazing interviews we’ve gotten with the Duwamish, Chinook, politicians, activists and academics into a fascinating, artfully-done film. As I said to one of our donors earlier today, it’s hard not to sound PBS-y when I talk about how “your donation helps provide great programming for PEOPLE LIKE YOU” but it is what it is: you’re helping and that’s amazing.

I just can’t believe I have such amazing friends here online. From my early days here on Tumblr when people helped me recover from my miscarriage, or helped workshop my novel, to those of you who just interact with me regularly with my random TV-obsessed, puppy-centric, writing and filmmaking life; I feel so much better about what I’m taking on any given day knowing I have such fantastic friends here. 

Tumblr-love.

So Vasant and I had to cancel our Comic-Con plans last minute. It broke my heart to email everybody down there today and tell them that we wouldn’t be arriving tomorrow. 

Remarkably, even though the Con is off for Vasant and I, we still have gotten to see a lot of wonderful Tumblr people this month. 

Last week, Kevin and Nick spent a great three days with us. Yesterday, we got to meet Ralph and his family, having lunch with Jules on her layover. And next week, Jennifer is coming up to stay with us for a while. 

While we’re missing the opportunity to see Erin again, and to meet Lady and Mr. Of The House and PalmtreePalmtree for the first time, I still feel really lucky that July is so packed with opportunities to see the amazing people I love so much.

I hope those of you at Con have an amazing time. Vasant and I are heartbroken to miss spending the week with you.

And for those of you stuck with me, sweltering in the heat at home without so much as ONE DOCTOR WHO COSPLAY SIGHTING, let’s turn on something incredible nerdy and blog about it with each other. We’ll make our own fun…

Valentine’s Day, for me, has always been a day to tell your family that you love them.
Think about it. This is not your primary impulse on Thanksgiving.
You get out of bed on Turkey Day and you think, “FOOD!” or, if you’re me, “I’m late. It’s 8 am and I haven’t started cooking yet!”
You get out of bed on Christmas and you’re thinking “Presents! Nostalgia! Shiny!” it is basically the day when we all become ADD-afflicted eight year olds, hyped up on sugar that we haven’t even ingested yet.
You have Easter and you think… well, nothing. A melange of religious symbolism, bunnies and horrible dresses you were forced to wear to bee-infested picnics as a kid.
Of course, all these holidays and those smaller ones in between, are supposed to be about family togetherness. But there is no overarching mandate of love. If you dig at the symbolism, there is of course, a bounty to feast upon for those starving for reasons to attach the day to a philosophic truth. And I do that. Every year. I LOVE searching for meaning and taking opportunities to remind myself of family, memories, my values and my faith. Observing holidays for me is like a calendar rosary. Each date touched, another thought or value observed, imbibed and passed on to those around me.
But this is why I love THIS day. 
I never dated anyone before Vasant. I went out with a bunch of guys, but I never went on more than dates. I never called anyone a boyfriend but him, because my standards for a committed relationship were high but also… the view of marriage that I had was kind of poor. I didn’t want to settle down with anyone unless I found someone extraordinary. And I did.
But this means that for more than two-thirds of my life, Valentine’s Day has just been a day to say “I love you” to those whom I loved. My Mom started this off when we were kids, preparing Valentine’s Day treats for us. Sometimes we got books, sometimes flowers,  rarely we got candy but we did see it now and then, mostly they were gifts that said “I love you”. They told us that she was paying attention. She and Dad would write a card and send us a note telling us what they loved. And that’s how I viewed Valentine’s Day.
I never felt bad for being single. I had people in my life whom I loved and Valentine’s Day was simply the day to tell them that. It was also the day to tell myself that. 
That is still, though I’m married, how I view Valentine’s Day. It’s not a day exclusive to me and my sweetie. It’s a day where I tell my family how much I love them. Give them whatever presents I can afford to get them. Vasant and I still do romantic stuff, but for me, it’s the afterthought to just telling him and those around me how much I love them. Because that’s what this day is to me. Today is the day you take time to tell people you love them.
And I know Hallmark has capitalized on this day. So what? How isn’t it nice to get a note that says I love you? Or in my sisters’ cases, heart-shaped snowflakes with a love note and cookies on top….
And this year, I wanted to widen the net and tell you all that I love you. You are just simply the best online community I’ve ever been connected with and I can’t imagine how I would’ve made it through 2011 without your support, humor and encouragement. 
I hope that tonight, you feel loved and cared for, whether you’re with someone or not. There isn’t a single one of you who isn’t incredibly talented, intelligent and hilarious. You brighten my day, push me creatively and CONSTANTLY inspire and humble me with how you all handle your problems, look for beauty around you and how you reach out to others. 
Thank you all for being so wonderful. I love you.
Happy Valentine’s Day.

Valentine’s Day, for me, has always been a day to tell your family that you love them.

Think about it. This is not your primary impulse on Thanksgiving.

You get out of bed on Turkey Day and you think, “FOOD!” or, if you’re me, “I’m late. It’s 8 am and I haven’t started cooking yet!”

You get out of bed on Christmas and you’re thinking “Presents! Nostalgia! Shiny!” it is basically the day when we all become ADD-afflicted eight year olds, hyped up on sugar that we haven’t even ingested yet.

You have Easter and you think… well, nothing. A melange of religious symbolism, bunnies and horrible dresses you were forced to wear to bee-infested picnics as a kid.

Of course, all these holidays and those smaller ones in between, are supposed to be about family togetherness. But there is no overarching mandate of love. If you dig at the symbolism, there is of course, a bounty to feast upon for those starving for reasons to attach the day to a philosophic truth. And I do that. Every year. I LOVE searching for meaning and taking opportunities to remind myself of family, memories, my values and my faith. Observing holidays for me is like a calendar rosary. Each date touched, another thought or value observed, imbibed and passed on to those around me.

But this is why I love THIS day. 

I never dated anyone before Vasant. I went out with a bunch of guys, but I never went on more than dates. I never called anyone a boyfriend but him, because my standards for a committed relationship were high but also… the view of marriage that I had was kind of poor. I didn’t want to settle down with anyone unless I found someone extraordinary. And I did.

But this means that for more than two-thirds of my life, Valentine’s Day has just been a day to say “I love you” to those whom I loved. My Mom started this off when we were kids, preparing Valentine’s Day treats for us. Sometimes we got books, sometimes flowers,  rarely we got candy but we did see it now and then, mostly they were gifts that said “I love you”. They told us that she was paying attention. She and Dad would write a card and send us a note telling us what they loved. And that’s how I viewed Valentine’s Day.

I never felt bad for being single. I had people in my life whom I loved and Valentine’s Day was simply the day to tell them that. It was also the day to tell myself that. 

That is still, though I’m married, how I view Valentine’s Day. It’s not a day exclusive to me and my sweetie. It’s a day where I tell my family how much I love them. Give them whatever presents I can afford to get them. Vasant and I still do romantic stuff, but for me, it’s the afterthought to just telling him and those around me how much I love them. Because that’s what this day is to me. Today is the day you take time to tell people you love them.

And I know Hallmark has capitalized on this day. So what? How isn’t it nice to get a note that says I love you? Or in my sisters’ cases, heart-shaped snowflakes with a love note and cookies on top….

And this year, I wanted to widen the net and tell you all that I love you. You are just simply the best online community I’ve ever been connected with and I can’t imagine how I would’ve made it through 2011 without your support, humor and encouragement. 

I hope that tonight, you feel loved and cared for, whether you’re with someone or not. There isn’t a single one of you who isn’t incredibly talented, intelligent and hilarious. You brighten my day, push me creatively and CONSTANTLY inspire and humble me with how you all handle your problems, look for beauty around you and how you reach out to others. 

Thank you all for being so wonderful. I love you.

Happy Valentine’s Day.

Target: Tom Hardy Butt

jennhoney:

sarahsamudre:

In reference to Jennifer and I’s gif skirmish the other day, which began when she naked man’d my man and ended with Tom Hardy getting shot in the butt…

me: AAH! I found a great gif of the butt shot. Perfection. THE DAY IS MINE. 

 Erin: YOU WIN! I am so jealous of your gifhunting skills.

me: Of course, it’s meant to be retaliation, but I’m giving her Hardy butt, which she’ll love. So I don’t win?  … I win at friendship! 

Erin: It is impossible to retaliate with jennifer since she’s so damn cute 

me: It is! It’s a cute force field. All attacks hit the shield and get turned into bunnies and stuff. 

Erin: So obnoxious.

Jennifer and I love each other soooo much. Erin and I love loving Jennifer sooooo much.

Even if she does have that annoying bunny shield.

WAIT, did you two conspire against me with the Hardy butt shot? I am more than okay with that, for the tumblr record, I am for butt conspiracies. I am for ughbutts conspiring. I am for loving you both so much! You both WIN at friendship <3

But Butt, do not picture me cute. Picture me a cloud of swears in almost the same outfit from yesterday,for no fun reason. Picture me a Luke Danes-esque grumbly mumbly woman-child minus the baseball cap, because, sportz, GEEZUS.

There are bunnies and goats. Biting, swearing, bunnies and goats.

okay, it all still somehow manages to sound a bit cute, I think it’s the filter of the internet.

What I do seem to have a consistent knack for, is endearing myself to really amazing people.

Jennifer. You should know this by now.

Erin and I have TRULY warped senses of what is cute. I mean, YES, bunnies and kitties are apart of it. But almost everything is cute and adorable to us, unless they’re despair or wrath inspiring.

We all KNOW you’re Bitey and lovelier for being Bitey.

Erin and I (and pretty much everyone else in the mafia) have a need to find things awesome and adorable. You and Erin have a Bronson breakfast blog! For Pete’s sake, to a normal person, that is not adorable. But I find the fact that you guys have a bit devoted to that particular movie… crazy fucking adorable. 

We’re all adorably off-putting and oddly charismatic.

I’m just glad we all found each other.

jennhoney:

sarahsamudre:

For Jules.
Also, as it pertains to butts, for Jennifer.

  #butts are for jennifer #hey HEY GUYS hey #I’m back #afternoon butt blog #glitterbubbles #ten is for jules #butts are fpr jennifer #jennhoney #i expect you to track  now
hahahaha, oh dear ughbutt, I’m SO GLAD you are back! &lt;3
butts are for everyone! 
this picture scares me a bit. 
do I track for or fpr? or both? We, all need to synchronize our tags I have three different versions of belieb in yohselv.

Obviously don&#8217;t track fpr. I reblogged from my phone and my phone hates the Tumblr app because it&#8217;s undeservedly pretentious.
We DO need to synchronize our tags though. Maybehaps we should compile a DW Mafia/Flying Unicorn Pack tag list. That could be hilarious to read through. ALDA TAGS, from ALDA UHGBUTTS. 

jennhoney:

sarahsamudre:

For Jules.

Also, as it pertains to butts, for Jennifer.

#butts are for jennifer #hey HEY GUYS hey #I’m back #afternoon butt blog #glitterbubbles #ten is for jules #butts are fpr jennifer #jennhoney #i expect you to track now

hahahaha, oh dear ughbutt, I’m SO GLAD you are back! <3

butts are for everyone!

this picture scares me a bit.

do I track for or fpr? or both? We, all need to synchronize our tags I have three different versions of belieb in yohselv.

Obviously don’t track fpr. I reblogged from my phone and my phone hates the Tumblr app because it’s undeservedly pretentious.

We DO need to synchronize our tags though. Maybehaps we should compile a DW Mafia/Flying Unicorn Pack tag list. That could be hilarious to read through. ALDA TAGS, from ALDA UHGBUTTS. 

PNW Creative Funny Ladies

wonderwanda replied to your post: You are currently in Seattle. I am currently in…

I’m flattered! Who knew devoting my life to sheer dorkitude could land me such lovely followers <333 And DUH YES PNW creative ladies unite! We should start a gang. (Including tribal prison tatts and offensive graffiti. Y/y? )

Oh lovely new friend:

  • Devotion to dorkitude may be the ONLY way to get ahead in life (other than bribery, nepotism and mafia hit jobs).
  • I am so down for gangs. Mafias. Syndicates. I roll with the #DW Mafia! (DW = Doctor Who) on Tumblr already… so how’s that for a mix of dorkitude and crime organizations.
  • Let’s get on this PNW Creative Funny Ladies Gang. Beware our jokes, worship of SNL ladies and tee shirt making abilities!

Srsly.

Bad Things, Good Things, Awesomely Weird Things.

Bad Things:

  • My Thursday was cheering up, and then got worse. The stuff that made my week worse progressed for the next couple days and may not be over. I don’t know. My stress level has been up around 11 because of it. 
  • Now that I know I can go see my Grandmother, I need to deal with the emotional consequences that a trip to the Bay Area has for me. I had a rough time growing up. Was beat up, made fun of, harassed and that’s just the good stuff I feel comfortable divulging online. The Bay Area holds very few good memories for me. Going back always triggers a kind of trauma state as my brain strives to function against a host of sensations trying to bring up memories I spend a lot of energy repressing. 
  • Still having a tough time wrapping my mind around the fact that I’m going down there to say goodbye to my Grandma

Good Things:

  • Like I said last week, Vasant’s amazing boss is paying for our airfare to go down to see my Grandmother with his extra airline miles. I have a lot of points for Starwood hotels, so I redeemed some and got us a hotel nearby for free. All we have to do is work out transportation and this trip will work out amazingly well for next to nothing, price-wise.
  • You guys. You are all amazing. I’ve loved the texts, phone chats with Jules, emails from you all and notes on my posts. I know I’ve been gone over the last week alot, but my heart has been with you guys, and the people who went out of their way to send me messages… you made me cry. I can’t remember the last time I felt so loved by friends. 
  • Vasant is working from home today, which is great, cause I am Miss Pouty Pants and Vasant is a calming presence that reminds me to stop being so missish.

Awesomely Weird Things:

  • Last night I dreamt of Wagner’s Ring Cycle. I dreamt Vasant and I were asked to sing in it, and Vasant got to play both Odin and Fafnir the Dragon and I got to play all the rest of the parts, but whenever I tried to sing, it would sound like a trumpet, not a human voice…. so they made me go down and join the orchestra as a trumpet.
  • I rolled over in bed this morning and told Vasant my fabulously weird dream and he rolled over, kissed my forehead and smiled. ”I dreamt we were cousins. And we got married anyway.”
  • He chuckled to himself and then shut his eyes again.

This is why we are so good together. We give each other love points for weirdness.

So yes. Hopefully the bad things will start to subside soon, or at least find a stasis. If they don’t, and I’m quiet, come looking for me.

But for now, I’m doing well. Buoyed up by your encouragement, I’m back and queueing up some pointlessly awesome posts and trying to catch up all the days that I’ve missed.

Happy Monday!

My Grandmother is dying. 

She has six Stage 4, inoperable tumors. They don’t know how much longer she has for this world, but they now know that her days are limited, and they will end sometime in the next couple of months because of this cancer. 

I’m not going to summarize how I feel, because that keeps shifting every seven minutes and twenty-six seconds. 

I may be quiet, I may be hyperactive… I don’t know yet. Yesterday I was incredibly quiet.  I may pretend like nothing’s wrong for minute, but that won’t be the case. Yesterday, my Dad and I laughed for five minutes in the middle of a family meeting about something very odd and incredibly dark. Sometimes you just need a laugh. It doesn’t mean you’ve stopped hurting.

Anyway, just in case I do go dark, that’s one of the things going on.

jennhoney:

I need a tablet so I can draw gnomeboners!
Please allow me to introduce my phone- Cat Karl Pigwidgeon Fancy McRingDingle the Luckphone of the SpaceDragons.

World:
Let&#8217;s all chip in and get Jennifer a tablet so we can see her art up some gnomeboners. There are at least 99.99 of us in the DW Mafia, right? If we each gave a dollar, we could get HI-DEF MFK Games!!! 
HIGH DEFINITION, people.
So let&#8217;s come up with that dollar. And make sure there are 99.99 of us.
I know there are at least 9 of us.

jennhoney:

I need a tablet so I can draw gnomeboners!

Please allow me to introduce my phone-
Cat Karl Pigwidgeon Fancy McRingDingle the Luckphone of the SpaceDragons.

World:

Let’s all chip in and get Jennifer a tablet so we can see her art up some gnomeboners. There are at least 99.99 of us in the DW Mafia, right? If we each gave a dollar, we could get HI-DEF MFK Games!!! 

HIGH DEFINITION, people.

So let’s come up with that dollar. And make sure there are 99.99 of us.

I know there are at least 9 of us.


That one time at the MFK Games where all Haunted Leg Hell broke loose in the FuturePast.
Basically, everyone wants you to FEEL BETTER NOW!

I love that when I draw Jennifer, I draw her the way Jennifer does. And she drew me, with my nose style. We show our love to each other by homaging each other&#8217;s noses. THIS IS WHAT FRIENDS ARE FOR.
No, seriously, I looked up at Vasant and said, &#8220;Aaaaaw! She drew my nose!!!!&#8221;
(He had no idea who &#8220;she&#8221; was or where it had been drawn or why. I like not giving him a frame of reference sometimes. He finds it funnier that way.)
I&#8217;ve stared at this image for a while now and I keep noticing new things. I love how haunted my leg is&#8230;. I hope we all get the cloche of wellness! My legs are STILL haunted, although the ghost is much tinier now than in the above illustration.

That one time at the MFK Games where all Haunted Leg Hell broke loose in the FuturePast.

Basically, everyone wants you to FEEL BETTER NOW!

I love that when I draw Jennifer, I draw her the way Jennifer does. And she drew me, with my nose style. We show our love to each other by homaging each other’s noses. THIS IS WHAT FRIENDS ARE FOR.

No, seriously, I looked up at Vasant and said, “Aaaaaw! She drew my nose!!!!”

(He had no idea who “she” was or where it had been drawn or why. I like not giving him a frame of reference sometimes. He finds it funnier that way.)

I’ve stared at this image for a while now and I keep noticing new things. I love how haunted my leg is…. I hope we all get the cloche of wellness! My legs are STILL haunted, although the ghost is much tinier now than in the above illustration.

glitterbubbles replied to your post: Claire Will Marry Merlin. There. Settled.
y’know, I love how when you decided I’m DonGlitterbubbles it was (I think?) because my enthusiasm &amp;love for Doctor Who interested people in it? suddenly my enthusiasm &amp;love has spawned a heretofore unknown fear of me. hahahaha. I LOVE YOU!!!xoxoxoxo
It is also because I wouldn&#8217;t know anyone worth knowing on Tumblr without you. You introduced everyone to all these great people. You taught me how to use Tumblr the RIGHT way, you always seem to know what&#8217;s going on with people and have this magical, powerful way to fix it. So yes, there was getting me into DW, but you&#8217;re also the key to community. We all feel incredibly despondent when you&#8217;re not around!
I think Jennifer and I ascribe awesome fearitude to your position as Don because&#8230; well, honestly&#8230; Jennifer and I would love to be feared. Apparently, I have a Napoleon complex and Jennifer is her own epic comic heroine and has a goat sidekick (a goat with a warrior&#8217;s helmet, no less). We&#8217;d love to inspire fear, but happily follow you, because we love you and the way we love you means we also make jokes about you killing people with hairdryers, banishing us places and the like. It&#8217;s our weird way of saying we love you and love that you&#8217;re the leader of our madcap little group. 
So hugs, bows, trembles and peace offerings to you. You&#8217;re amazing and I wouldn&#8217;t be on here at all or know anyone who&#8217;s changed my life or my book this year without YOU. 

glitterbubbles replied to your post: Claire Will Marry Merlin. There. Settled.

y’know, I love how when you decided I’m DonGlitterbubbles it was (I think?) because my enthusiasm &love for Doctor Who interested people in it? suddenly my enthusiasm &love has spawned a heretofore unknown fear of me. hahahaha. I LOVE YOU!!!xoxoxoxo

It is also because I wouldn’t know anyone worth knowing on Tumblr without you. You introduced everyone to all these great people. You taught me how to use Tumblr the RIGHT way, you always seem to know what’s going on with people and have this magical, powerful way to fix it. So yes, there was getting me into DW, but you’re also the key to community. We all feel incredibly despondent when you’re not around!

I think Jennifer and I ascribe awesome fearitude to your position as Don because… well, honestly… Jennifer and I would love to be feared. Apparently, I have a Napoleon complex and Jennifer is her own epic comic heroine and has a goat sidekick (a goat with a warrior’s helmet, no less). We’d love to inspire fear, but happily follow you, because we love you and the way we love you means we also make jokes about you killing people with hairdryers, banishing us places and the like. It’s our weird way of saying we love you and love that you’re the leader of our madcap little group. 

So hugs, bows, trembles and peace offerings to you. You’re amazing and I wouldn’t be on here at all or know anyone who’s changed my life or my book this year without YOU.